Monday, August 20, 2012

2.20.8.12. Interviewing

I really hate interviewing people.  

First off; getting to the point where on paper, you think the applicant is worth talking to is hard enough.  It's almost as if filling out a job application properly should come with a Mensa certificate at this point.  People always leave shit blank, seemingly unimportant things, such as previous employment history, job skills, and references...I suppose this is what I get for working retail management.  

Secondly; If by the grace of God, after summoning all semblance of concentration and with great mental fortitude, said applicant has sufficiently the employment application, and handed it in, you have to go about the agonizing task of a formal interview.  

You've done it.  You've selected which monkey you're going to suit up and blast into space.  Now, I use this space monkey analogy for a very specific reason: hiring someone to fill a minimum wage retail job is EXACTLY like choosing a monkey to shoot into space.  Dumb retard monkey who barely knows what is going on, and quite possibly has no idea where he/she is, must take on the incredible task of space exploration without any skills, training, or knowledge.  Now I'm not sure if I really articulated my point properly, but I think you get what I mean.

I really just can't stand how every person I interview couldn't talk their way out of a paper bag.  As if everything I ask is a trick question or at anytime if they let their guard down and speak to me like a real person and not some robot that's interrogating them they might die.  I'm interviewing you for a job that requires you to SPEAK TO PEOPLE.  Honestly, if a person can answer in complete sentences without stuttering or saying "uuuhhhhhhh", they've got a pretty big leg up on the great majority of other applicants.  

Sunday, August 19, 2012

1.19.8.12. Why Am I Here?

So I've been toying with the idea of starting a blog or some platform for bitching in a public setting for some time now.  Basically I'm trying to figure out how to vent my general frustration with most things in a way that won't make my friends/usual acquaintances want to punch me in the dick for ranting on and on about shit that pisses me off, because lets face it, we all have a friend that does that and we all want to tell that friend to sack up and deal with it or shut the fuck up.  I'm here to tell you that I am incapable of shutting up and dealing with the things in life that piss me off, so we'll see if this helps. Doubtful, but we'll see.  Best case scenario, I get to vent and maybe someone will enjoy reading this and feels the same way I do.  Worst case scenario I annoy/piss people off, like normal, and we all go about our normal everyday life.